: P

Probably the stupidest thing I’ve ever seen.

No, wait… this is.

…is actually not bad.
http://www.tfl.gov.uk/roadusers/cycling/11598.aspx

I was initially disappointed to find the “Cycling Journey Planner” looks like a lazy modification of the standard TfL journey planner, with the word “cycle” instead of “walk”. However, click on the “start” or “end” maps and it actually gives you a full cycle route breakdown, albeit in multi-page PDF format.  I found it suggested some ‘I didn’t realise that was there’ routes as well as a couple of unnecessarily road-avoiding ones. However, generally as an initial guide to cycling from one place to another in London without being too caught up in traffic, it’s pretty good.

: P

The yearly guided ride with numbers is on again.

Registrations are open for SSUK 09.  It’s taking place in Dalby Forest oop Yaarkshire way on the 6/7th June 2009.  Entry is £36 and includes camping, a place on the start line and a post race BBQ.

It’s always a great laugh full of beer, bikes and, well, beer.  See the SSUK09 website for more details.

Cycle chic or bicycle chic is the culture of cycling in fashionable clothes. It is now associated with the strong utility cycling movement. Cycling is an everyday transport choice and many cyclists choose to wear their regular clothes, as opposed to outfits generally associated with cycle sport, such as bicycle shorts, lycra, gloves and shoes.  Sydney Body Art Ride.

Which is all well and good if you are cycling along the pavement from your East London squat to your East London art school, but if you are travelling any distance and want people to feel comfortable in close proximity to you at the other end, a change of clothes would be the considerate thing to carry.

What’s more, should you fall from your bike your hands will slip from your non-taped bars, you’ll love the road-rash on your palms where your gloves should have been and your ironic hair cut will just not provide enough cushioning as your head hits the ground.

I know a lot of people don’t deem this stuff necessary, but it only takes one slip up to really ruin your day.

I’m definitely not nearly quick enough to wear them, and would undoubtedly look like a bit of a weirdo, but I still think they’re a great stocking filler.

Although this was designed to highlight the danger of walking into the road while lost in your own little world, it’s a good time to remember how idiotic being an “iPod zombie” on a bike really is: cars and motorbikes have rear view mirrors; cyclists have ears.  If you want to “get in the zone” or isolate yourself from the outside world, don’t do it in traffic.  At least, don’t expect to do it for long.

: P

Found on Urban Cycle Chic.

I just came across Save Our Soles, a fab looking sock company based in Colorado (why are none of these sort of people ever based in the UK?).  They do a whole range of wool socks for cycling and other sweaty pursuits, including the rather nifty Argyll/hockey stick ones above.

Anyway, check them out – at $11.95 a pair they are pretty cheap for wool socks, although probably less so once shipping is factored in.  Our favourites include Boneshaker, Retro Pedals and Movie Buff.

Rapha have gone all the way and produced a limited edition tweed softshell jacket. Like many things Rapha, I both wonder if the world really needs, for example, a £50 silk cycling scarf, but also really, really want one. The jacket:

beautiful as it is (proper pictures here) just doesn’t quite do it for me – I’m more of a traditionalist when it comes to tweed, and would have preferred a classic green or brown, as opposed to what looks to me much more like a business suit check. In any case, none of this matters since, at £450 (which looks even worse from my vantage point on the Western edge of the Atlantic) I’m not going to be able to afford one. Ever.

But I still want it.

What interests me is not the sports metal soundtrack accompanying what appears to be fairly banal footage of some cyclists riding down the gaps in near-stationary traffic (something most of us would simply refer to as “commuting”), but the comments. “These guys are roadkill waiting to happen”, “crazy”, “insane” and of course an obligatory “I wopuld of hit him just for fun…asswipe bike on a freeway…fuckin moron.”

Thank you, FAIL Blog.

It’s highly possible that there’s a good reason for this, which I can’t think of. Having fallen foul of poorly adjusted brakes on a number of occasions (mostly off road mind you) I am a bit worried about whoever rides this. If you’re reading, please stop the craziness!

The entire journey will eventually be turned into a film – we can’t wait. London Singlespeed wish Blind Pilot the best of luck on their incredible tour, and sorely wish we could be there to support them.

The first Raceguard was invented in 1994, an innovative seatpost-mounted rear mudguard, and it rapidly became the market leader among mountain bikers and commuters alike as the simplest and best-looking way to avoid that “wet stripe” up the back of your clothes.  It was a great design, simple to fit (although to do so you had to remove the seatpost and slide shims on and off), easy to adjust and once fitted it stayed in place and was hard to break.  I bought one in ‘95 and it’s been in intermittent use since then and is still going strong.

For 2009 Mr. Crud’s been challenged to redesign it, chiefly so you don’t have to remove the seatpost to fit it.  Other manufacturers (SKS, Topeak, Cycraguard) have recognised the Raceguard’s popularity and produced similar offerings, some of which fitted straight around the seatpost, so after 11 years it was time for an update.

So what’s new?  As you can see from the photo above, the mudguard itself keeps the familiar (and very effective) shape of the recent “RacePak” incarnation, but the main thing that has changed is the clamp.  It can now be fitted straight around the seatpost and with a very British, very CRUD-like conciseness of design.

The pack contains two rubber shims, one seatpost clamp, one nut and bolt, the arm and the mudguard.  It’s all made out of flexible plastic that feels pliable but hard to break.  It weighs a lot less than it looks like it should.  It’s very simple to fit in less than a minute.  The shims mean it will suit seatposts from 25-33mm and, once everything’s in the right place, a few turns of the one bolt mean it’ll all stay put.

…and that’s just what it did.  Over lumpy rattly stuff and in soggy mud and rain, it kept our backs (and saddles) dry and free from The Stripe.  Neither branches nor not-going-to-make-it faceplants managed to shift it.  We’re impressed.  I’m sure that the 2009 redesign will be even more popular as its predecessor.

Mine’s going to stay on my bike.

From Bikesnob NYC last week:

Of course, the truth is that on a lot of terrain a singlespeed mountain bike isn’t much of a handicap. In fact, often it’s an advantage. When confronted with a steep grade on a singlespeed mountain bike, you either have to stomp up it really fast, or you have to run it. Meanwhile, the geared rider will downshift eternally until he’s spinning a tiny gear so violently he simply falls over.

I can’t decide whether this is a great idea, or a really terrible one.

While round-the-clock parts availability is a Good Thing, I can foresee drawbacks.  I can just imagine the typical phone call I’m going to get at 2am from some random hipster who’s snakebite-punctured his brakeless fixie slamming it into a kerb as he’s failed to stop in time; he’s dug out enough change for an inner tube and an energy gel and now, drunken but buzzing as the sugary caffeine kicks in, he decides to slur his way through asking me why the inner tube didn’t come with instructions…

Rollapaluza XI – Kingspin – is taking place on Friday 8th August at the (rather excellent) Bloomsbury Bowling Lanes, WC1.  £7.50 entry with DJs, a bar until 3am, cut price bowling, food and underground stewarded bike parking.  Better polish up those Deep Vs and proofide that Swallow Classic lest the stewards should look upon your ride in shame.

For those actually interested in the racing, qualification is between 7-9pm with individual knockout and team rounds continuing until 1am.  There are £2000 worth of prizes to be won including goodies from Swrve, Madison and Condor.

For those who have no idea what this is all about, it’s basically like going on a bike machine in the gym, but while competing against a bunch of couriers zoned out on adrenalin, angry commuters and gurning roadies with faces transformed into rictus grins of fear and aggression with lots of drinking, shouting, cheering and loud music going on around you.  The riders sprint for what would be 500m at speeds of over 50mph so each round is quickly over.  Photos and videos of past events are available on the Rollapaluza website.

Tickets for Kingspin can be purchased online or bought on the door.

The inventor (titter ye not, he’s only naked from the waist up) proposes waiting until your bike is stolen before giving the thief a little more than he bargained for (presumably first waiting for him to get stuck at traffic lights and put his foot down for maximum effect).  

I’d take it a little further and try to hook it up to something with a motion sensor – an iPhone or the like should do the trick, that way you can shock the perp automatically and get it to text you when the bike stops moving.

Of course, anyone nudging your bike while it’s locked up would get shocked too, but you can’t make an omelette without breaking some eggs.

I am a particular fan of steps 9 and 10:

Step 9 – Trying to make your bike unridable

Fixed gear riders advocate fixed gear bicycles as a method of this, that they are somehow more secure because they are harder to ride. They are forgetting that due to the unbearable popularity of fixed gear bikes, they have become incredibly attractive targets for theft. 

The accompanying picture is of a Bianchi Douchebag Pista with chopped flat bars. The author says:

I love the reflectors on the pedals, by the way.  Nice, really nice.

Step 10 advocates ratting your bike to make it look ugly.

even major bike manufacturers have taken to making intensionally ugly bicycles. Please, a bicycle should be a thing of beauty, make the madness stop. 

The accompanying picture?  A particularly nasty specimen of the Langster, London Edition.

Pretty spot on if you ask me.